Monday, September 3, 2012

The Positive Side Of Divorce

some part of me died with it. (6/52)
(Photo credit: judie uffe)

I recently became single again and I have to say that I am actually enjoying being back in the bachelor life! It is surprising how easy it was to slip back into being single again after a few years of marriage. Now I have to jump in and say don't feel sorry for me, the break up was the right thing. We didn't have kids and we had grown apart. It was very amicable and we are still friends. I think the issue was that we both got married because it was expected! If we had just stayed dating we might still be together, but I have come to realise that I am not marriage material and to be honest, neither was she! We got along great as a dating couple, but once we got married and lived together it all seemed forced. I am glad that we were able to just admit to each other that it wasn't working as it saved a lot of pain and heartache.

When we broke up, a lot of people were quick to point out the negative side of bachelor life, but you know what? There are some pretty great points to consider too! The first major point is that being a bachelor gives you much more freedom and independence. You can be spontaneous when it comes to an impromptu night out or a last minute road trip and no-one is going to make you choose between football and DIY! It's not that I am anti-relationship, but being single definitely gives me more choices in day to day life! This also leads to having more control over my time. I am a busy guy, my work life is demanding. When I had to worry about coming home at a reasonable time for my wife I often had to cut my work day short. Now when I have a big project on I am able to work through it knowing that no-one will get on my case because dinner got cold. It also gives me more time to enjoy my own hobbies. Fishing can be a weekend activity instead of a once a month treat! Of course, one major advantage is money! It is actually much cheaper to be a bachelor than it is to be a married man! No expensive dates or gifts for Christmas, Anniversaries, Birthdays, Valentines and so on! I also have the opportunity to blow cash on frivolous things like video games completely guilt free!

I'm not saying I will revert to the stereotypical college bachelor life, sitting in my underpants eating cold pizza for breakfast with not a clean plate in the house! If anything, my ex-wife trained me in cooking and cleaning and I am capable of fending for myself! Maybe that was the purpose of our marriage? To turn me into a successful single? One thing is certain, I am going to make the most of my bachelor life and not dwell on the negatives of divorce. After all,it was the best choice for both of us and it allowed us to remain friends instead of becoming bitter and twisted shells of ourselves who loathe each other.


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